Update: Where Have I Been?

Why hello there my lovely readers, long time no blog post, its been far too long!

This blog post is simply going to be a little update of whats gone on since I last wrote and also explaining a little bit about whats going on with me and why I haven’t been around! Since my last blog post I turned 21, so its official  I am a legal adult in every country. I had a lovely Birthday where I felt extremely spoilt, loved and grateful to have such amazing family around me. I received so many amazing gifts and went for my first ever wagamama’s which I can confirm lived up to its hype. The famous katsu curry was delicious and the katsu banana with salted caramel ice-cream pudding was perfection to say the least. Not only that I then got taken out again, this time for afternoon tea for the first time, with my mum.

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So why haven’t I written a blog post in so long? I think that’s due to a number of things, let me try to explain the best I can without giving away too many personal details. I hadn’t realized until recently how disconnected I had become to everything around me and it’s hit me hard realizing what I’ve become like. I’ve become self-destructive, lazy, depressive and someone I don’t like very much, a tired, negative and depressed girl who stopped taking care of herself. I’ve been in my own little world and not a positive one. I became uninterested in blogging and most other things around me. Blogging has been one extremely positive thing I’ve kept going until recently and I miss it. I miss channeling my creative thoughts, communicating within the blogging community and doing something I enjoy, but temporarily forgot I did. I want to better myself now and return to reality as I feel like I’ve been running away from my problems, saying I’m trying, saying tomorrow or next week or next month I will try to sort my self out, when in reality for the last 5 years I’ve been saying the exact same thing.

Instead of my OCD being the problem or my anxiety, I had just become self-destructive in many areas of my life that I hadn’t noticed until recently when it’s all hit me and I’ve had some home truths from people around me. Even writing this post I can feel my eyes filling with tears because I feel like I’ve been so lost and still am but finally realizing this and taking steps to better myself. Its upsetting me realizing how vacant I’ve been, living a life that is mainly on my computer and slowly self-destructing and losing my self-worth on a downward spiral. Its like I stopped caring about looking after myself.

I suppose we all lose ourselves sometimes and until we realize we have, we can’t change. If you are feeling lost in life like me, please know that you are not alone and you can and will find yourself just like I will soon. No more negativity, I can and will find myself this time, as can you, you just have to believe. I’ve stopped brushing everything that’s wrong with my life under the carpet now, and if you know you’re struggling you have to as well. Just know that it may hurt and be hard to deal with thinking about, accepting and acknowledging these problems you’re facing and changes you need to make but once you’ve done that you can finally start to heal and take steps to change just as I am. If anyone is struggling and feeling lost always feel free to contact me via my Tumblr ask box – anonymous or not, my Facebook Page or my twitter, all links will be below. Your not alone, I am here for you and will support you.

I’m ready to start making changes now, are you?

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I’m back ready to blog, I don’t know if anyone actually noticed I was gone but I want to thank any of my followers and new followers who have stuck around even though I have failed to write recently.

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Stay strong,

Anna

Decorating My Room | Ideas & Plans

In November me and my family moved from our house we’d been in for almost 7 years! The new house is somewhat old-fashioned when it comes to the decorating which means everything’s going to be decorated to our tastes. For someone like me who loves browsing home ware shops and buying home ware items this is prime opportunity for me to do both those things. My room as it is, isn’t to bad it has quaint floral wallpaper and fairly neutral paint and carpet.

I cannot wait to get fully stuck in and decorate my room with my taste in decor. I’d say my taste is a mixture of kitsch, anything cute, quirky or involving woodland animals. I also love the retro come modern look, with a hint of Scandinavian. I love scouring magazines and the internet for inspiration and home ware items, so I thought why not share my plans for my bedroom with you. Then when it’s all decorated show a before and after! Some of the products featured in this post I have already purchased ready for when my rooms decorated, others are things I would like to purchase and possibly add into my room, along with many other beautiful things I’ve found.

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As you can see the colours I want to incorporate into my room are white, a mustardy, greeny yellow, light grey and dark grey. I’ve been seeing this yellow colour everywhere at the moment and I love how it looks, I think its perfect for a retro and Scandinavian room. It’s something quite different for me, as I’ve always gone for classic girly colours like pinks, purples as an accent colour in my rooms, but my style has changed a lot as I’ve gotten older.

I won’t be painting any walls in this shade instead I want to bring it in with accessories. I bought this gorgeous duvet set which you can see in the picture above or below. Its two-sided so you can mix it up and has  multiple patterns on it such scalloped lines and tiny flowers on it with all the colours I like, its perfect. I received  the panda cushion above for Christmas and I can’t wait to put it on my bed, not only is it cute, its quirky and his yellow bow tie goes perfect. I love the lampshade above it has a cut out pattern and copper on the inside. Copper is a big trend when it comes to home ware at the moment, and I’m a little obsessed. The bedside table above is simple and practical. Its got wire tidies up the legs of it, a shelf inside and its narrow which saves space!

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I have bought two of these tri pod style lamps for my bedside tables, I love this style of lamp at the moment and the colour is again perfect.

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Bedding
Panda Cushion
Lampshade
Bedside Table
Chest Of Draws
Tripod Lamp

Becuase my room is bigger than my old one, I’ve finally been able to have a dressing table. I wanted a retro one and was lucky my Nan no longer wanted her retro G-Plan one. I love the style and I’m planning on painting it white or light grey with darker grey drawes and changing the handles, I’ve been eyeing up some of the copper ones on Anthropologie.

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Bedroom blog post

 I want to create a wall of quirky prints and different shape and style photo frames like the copper ones above. Which leads me on to the fox and alpaca prints above, I find them way too amusing and really like the look of them, I also received these for Christmas. The next two items are the Peg Boards, I love the concept of these but can’t decide between the yellow or white, there just a board with holes for little wooden peg like things, you put into the holes to hang things off. I want to hang this by my dressing table and hang all my necklaces and bits on there.

Another item which I think would look lovely on my dressing table is the copper tray with perfumes displayed on there. As I’ve said I’m rather fond of quirky things, which is probably why I like this succulent pineapple plant pot, I think its different and a great way to display a succulent. I would love to have some shelves where I can put this sort of thing on display, along with things like the Copper A, or candles in the white candle holders above, along with all my other decorative accessories.

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Photo Frames
Copper A
Candle Holders
Copper Tray
Fox Print
Alpaca Print
Peg Board Yellow
Peg Board White
Pineapple Plant Pot

I could go on forever adding things I am thinking of buying but I didn’t want to bore you or make this post too long. There so much I want to buy and do to my room and really create a space I love.

What do you think of my bedroom ideas? Let me know in the comments!

Anna

A Letter To Myself | Weight Loss

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If you have followed my blog for a while now, you will know I have done a couple of blog posts I call ‘Letters To Myself’. You can read these in the links just below, to familiarize yourself with the concept, as this one will be very similar:

A Letter To My Younger Self

A Letter To Yourself For When You’re Struggling

I have wanted to lose weight for a long time now, to make myself happy and gain confidence. I really struggle with cravings for naughty foods and tend to binge eat. I lost 3 stone so I know I can do it, it’s just sticking to it. Which is when I came up with this idea incorporating my ‘Letter To My Self’ blog posts. I am going to write a short ‘letter’ to myself for when I am desperately craving foods I know I shouldn’t have or when I feel like going on a binge.

 When your mind is telling you, you REALLY want that piece of cake, that burger or take away its hard to take control and say NO. It feels like there’s a magnetic force pulling you towards the foods you know you shouldn’t eat. I think during those moments you lose sight of all the reasons why you want to lose weight, having that cake seems like a better idea, until afterwards. This is something you reading this can do to, write it down or type it out and print it off, to read when your on the verge of breaking your healthy eating plan. Reading a letter you yourself have written when in a positive mind set is the perfect reminder you need. This is your very own personal letter containing all those reasons you want achieve your weight loss goal, its not a quote or picture off the internet.


 Dear Me,

Let me guess you’re craving multiple bars of chocolate, cakes, sweets, sugary drinks and fatty foods? well let me remind you why you don’t want to give into these feelings.

♥ Cravings will pass. I know it feels like torture not to allow yourself to have something you really want to eat, but that feeling will pass. Wait an hour or two before you give in to these cravings and impulses, it may have been and gone by then. If you really can’t resist picking on something, choose a healthier option such as, apple or banana with peanut butter or a healthy cereal bar. Have one thing only, you know more than one of something is excessive and these are the habits you know you want to break.

 ♥ Remember why you want to lose weight. You know you need to do this for yourself, you want this so bad. Think of the confidence you will gain and think of all the things your weight stops you doing, because of your lack of confidence. Imagine walking into a room and not instantly thinking ‘I bet people think I’m fat’, but feeling good instead.

♥ Imagine going shopping for clothes and not getting into the changing room and feeling upset at the sight of yourself. Imagine all the clothes you could buy and feel amazing in, no restrictions on styles of things you think will suit your body shape, just pick anything you like and try it on with no qualms.

♥ Not only will you look good, you will feel good. Imagine how much lighter and healthier you will feel.

♥ This time next week, month or even year, where do you want to be? Will that naughty food or multiple chocolate bars be worth it? Or will loosing another pound, another half a stone or being at your goal be 100x more worth it. I think you know the answer. A month or year down the line, don’t let yourself be wishing you had kept going and wondering how far you could have come by now. Do it and you’ll see.

♥ Only you can make it happen, why dream about how amazing it would feel to lose weight, when you can make that dream come true!

♥ That work out you are dreading is going to get you where you want to be  faster, make you fitter and its only one hour out of your whole day.

Love from,

postive you x


Let me know in the comments if you plan on doing this or if you think its a good idea?

Anna

1st Of December | Count Down To Christmas

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So it’s the 1st of December, which means it’s officially the count down to Christmas. I know what you’re thinking ‘another over excited Christmas lover’ well its true! I could not help but write a blog post relating to Christmas, now I think it’s officially acceptable to get excited for it. For those of you shouting ‘bah humbug’ well you’ll either loath this blog post or maybe it will get you in the festive mood and you’ll love it. My blog from now until Christmas is going to be filled with blog posts such as gift guides, stocking fillers, party fashion, Christmas jumpers and festive make up looks!

As a start to my Christmassy blog posts, I thought why not share all the reasons I am looking forward to about this festive month.

Putting up the Christmas tree and decorating the house

Cute Christmas decorations

Log fires

♥ Mince pies

♥ Wrapping presents

Drinking mulled wine

♥ Family

Christmas shopping

 Cosy, cute PJ’s

 Slippers and cosy socks

 Giving presents

Receiving presents

Christmas lights

♥ Pigs in blankets

Christmas dinner

♥ Candles, candles and more candles

♥ Festive fashion and festive make up

♥ Baths with, Christmas Lush Cosmetics bath bombs

My dog in her Christmas Santa jumper

♥ Christmas blog posts

Scarves, hats, gloves, boots and coats

Costa Coffee, black forest hot chocolates and chai tea lattes

Listening to my favourite Christmas song ‘The Pogues – Fairytale Of New York’

 

What are you most looking forward to this Christmas? and what would you add to the list? Let me know in the comments!

Anna

Feel Good Friday: A Trip To The Zoo

Sorry that today’s Feel Good Friday blog post is a little late but today I went to the zoo!! I have wanted to go to the zoo for the longest time as I haven’t been since I was a lot younger. Travelling and going out for a day is kind of anxiety provoking for me, but everything went fine! Me, my Mum, my Brother and his Girlfriend all headed to Marwell Zoo, I love all animals, so I was like a child in a sweet shop. ‘Awwing’ at every animal I saw! We had lots of laughs along the way, commentating on what we thought the animals were thinking or would say if they could talk, in made up voices haha (does anyone else do that with animals and pets!?).  Here are just a few of the snaps I took on my travels around the animal park, sorry if the quality is not great, some were taking on zoom others were taken through glass!

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The red panda was one of my favourite animals I saw today, it was extremely cute. The pictures do not do it justice!

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Excuse the reflection of my mum in the glass, these monkeys remind me of little gremlins!

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3D cube made out of Limurs!

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Every time I tried to get a picture of the Meerkat’s faces they turned there bums to me, got one of them on ‘look out’ though! I was so tempted to reach in, pick one up and put it in my bag but I resisted. Simples squeak!

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The star of the show today was the Hippos. I love Hippos and always have and I got pretty snap happy and excited in the Hippo enclosure. These are pygmy hippos, which are smaller than normal ones and look how cute the baby is!!

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Tired baby!

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And of course me in full child mode purchased a little Hippo toy which is so soft!

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That was my day at the Zoo, did you do anything exciting today?

Happy Friday,

Anna

Feel Good Friday: Weight Loss & Motivation

Firstly I want to apologise for not posting a Feel Good Friday blog post for the last couple of weeks now. Today I am going to be writing about something that’s very close to my heart at the moment, which is weight loss. As some of you may know a while ago now I started Weight Watchers, I was ridiculously proud at myself for losing 3 stone, also surprised! For a while now I have fallen off the band wagon and not been as motivated as I was, which means I have put on some of the weight I lost, not all of it though, which I suppose is a positive. But that’s exactly what I want to talk about, being positive and looking forward. I have been feeling so angry at myself for not carrying on with my hard weight loss work and keep thinking about how far I could have come by now, if I had kept going. I am now frustrated that I have to lose the weight that I had already lost, it seems like such a waste of time, I’ve been there done that, I just want to be where I was and lose more!

I am sure a lot of you guys relate to what I am going through, right? Loosing weight is not easy but instead of being frustrated with myself I need to look at this differently, and if you reading this are also facing similar problems I think you should to! Although those things I talked about above are all really irritating, what is being angry at myself going to achieve? Nothing, accept make me more negative and less motivated, which is the last thing I need! The thing is the only way to get back to where I was before I fell off the wagon is to do it again. If I want to change my life, feel confident and healthy its my only option. I need to take this as a lesson, to keep me motivated and stop me from quitting when it gets hard! If there is something positive you want to achieve, like I do with loosing weight the only way to get there is to do something about it. I feel like I am finally back in my Weight Watchers mind set, although exercise is something I need to work on doing more off. Diet is way more important than exercise and the fact I am eating less and tracking what I am eating, is progress to getting back to where I left off and to lose even more this time.

I want to share some of my favourite motivating and positive weight loss quotes from Tumblr with all of you. I hope this will be motivating for anyone also struggling with loosing weight like I am, and also motivating for me! Hang in there!

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These are just a few of the quotes I chose, there are so many out there!

Happy Friday and stay strong,

Anna

 

 

A Letter To My Younger Self

I’ve seen videos relating to this on YouTube, so I thought I would write a blog post about it. I’m basically going to write a mini letter as if I was writing it to my younger self. Things I wish future me could tell young me and things I wish I knew back then.

What would you of told your younger self?

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Dear younger self,

Where do I start? There is a few things I would like to tell you and reassure you about before things spiral out of control for you. I know your worried about germs and washing your hands and always have been growing up, but I just want to tell you to not let this worry rule your life. Being sick isn’t very nice but honestly the next time you are it will expose you to this fear and you will be fine I promise you. I also want to warn you that later on you might notice weird feelings of NEEDING to do certain tasks, you will feel like this will stop you from being sick and also stop bad things from happening. When this happens I need you to stay strong and not give in. Carrying out tasks until they feel right and counting things etc won’t help. In fact you will thank me later if you don’t do the things. What you do can’t control if your ill or if something bad happens, trust me. You will go through 5 years of hell trying to beat OCD if you let it in, you’ve got to get control of it before it controls you. Try and get help as soon as you notice symptoms, educate yourself so you know about it. I know it feels really scary but you can do it.  If  OCD does take over your life for a while you will be ok and you will come out the other side, so hang in there please. Another thing that is going to really bother you when your older is your weight and eating habits. Please listen to people when they tell you not to over eat, this will become a huge problem for you and your confidence one day. Try to keep a healthy relationship with food, this will save so much time later on when you have to try to lose the weight to become confident again.

Another thing is, don’t grow up too quickly, your only young once and being grown up isn’t as fun as it sounds. Enjoy being young and don’t take school for granted, some of your fondest memories will be from within that school building you wish you didn’t go to. Which leads me to another thing, I know your naughty at school but try harder to behave. It doesn’t seem important but eventually you will end up on a 3 hour time-table barely seeing anyone, doesn’t seem like a bad thing? well you will drift apart from your friends and leave school feeling slightly out of the loop with people who you were once close with, leaving you feeling slightly alone.  When you first start going to party’s and drinking, try not to drink so much, I promise you will only wake up with regret and guilt, although you can learn from these mistakes just go easy!

Back to some things related to anxiety. I know you probably have already, but you  will have many more times to come where you feel scared of doing things. Scared that your going to embarrass yourself, please try to realise that you will miss out on things if you let the fear stop you. Try and face up to things that make you scared and try not to let the fear of what others think of you stop you. The more you do this now,  the more later on in life you will be likely to do things! Also, growing up doesn’t have to be so scary, talk to people around you about your worries but also talk about your normal problems and concerns everyone goes through growing up. You will grow to be able to talk about your problems openly and I promise you will wish you hadn’t been so embarrassed and shy about everything. Your parents will become your biggest support through any problems regarding your anxiety. You will be able to talk to them about anything you need to, so why not start now?

I just want to tell you everything is going to be ok, but to also tell you that things should be a lot easier now you know the things I’ve mentioned above. Keep being wonderfully weird, funny and creative. Last but not least don’t let OCD rule you, I know its scary but its harmless, so don’t even give it the time of day. The sooner you realise that the better.

Love from, an older, wiser version of you